Oh, Jacob!

This is a true story. It isn't fiction. This actually happened.
Jacob and I are sitting on the couch watching America's Funniest Home Videos when a commercial comes on for the movie Mary Poppins. I asked Jacob if he ever saw that movie and he looks me dead in the eye and says "Mary Poppins is gross". I am dumbfounded. How could Mary Poppins be gross? Seriously? So I ask him "Jacob, why is Mary Poppins gross?" He tells me this horrific story about her. I am shocked. The story is DEFINITLY not in the Mary Poppins movie. Do you want to know what the story was? Well here it is ...
Jacob believes that Mary Poppins poops in her underwear then grabs a spoon. Scoops up the poop with the spoon and feeds it to the children.
Yup, that is the story. That was never in the Mary Poppins movie I watched. But he is convinced.
I guess we won't ever be watching Mary Poppins.