Dear God,

Whew … it has been awhile since I have posted! It has kind of been a tornado whirlwind in my house lately.

School is back in full swing. I am taking five classes and each class requires a lot of work. I am really enjoying my new journey. I officially have 2 years left at school and it is flying by.

Even though my classmates are 19 years old and barely out of high school much younger than I am, I have been enjoying there company and their opinions on the classes, professors, and homework.

Jacob is flourishing in school. I have scheduled a parent teacher conference for February 5th and look forward to hearing all the great things his teacher has to say about him.

Not to gush too much but his teacher told me that she did a reading assessment test and he is testing at level 14!! At the beginning of the year he was testing at 3. He is making such great progress. I am so proud of him.

A few more changes are going on in our house right now. Jacob and I are praying every night! and No more TV at bedtime!

These changes have been a long time coming. I am embarrassed to say that Jacob and I never really prayed together. If we did pray, it was very sporadic and became super silly at times. I was not taking it seriously and neither was Jacob.

I think it was last week when I read an (IN)courage blog post by Kristen, author of We are THAT family, titled “Her Name is Grace because He is Amazing”. In that post Kristen said that her Dad prayed over her daughter while she laid in the NICU.

Immediately, after reading that line I bawled. I bawled the puffy eyes, semi-hyperventilating, and runny nosed bawl. Not pretty.

It had just hit me that … I never prayed over Jacob when he was in the NICU. Never once did I lay my hands on him and pray to God to keep him safe. Never once, did I pray that he would be healed. I am ashamed of myself.

But …

instead of beating myself over the past that is unchangeable, I figured it was time I changed the future.

So Jacob and I started praying together. He enjoys hearing me pray for God to take away his scary dreams and help him in school. His favorite part is when I thank God for giving me such a wonderful son.

This simple thing has made such a difference in the mood in our house.

Then on Wednesday, I dropped Jacob off at Awana’s and church had a flier entitled “Top 15 Verses Every Kid Should Know”. I picked up the flier, folded it up, stuck it in my pocket and forgot about it. Until now! I read through the verses tonight and I loved them. I love it that the church put this together. Jacob and I are going to work on these verses and start memorizing them. It will probably take some time but it is a great goal to work at.

If you would like to get the Top 15 Verses Every Kid Should Know let me know and I will email you the list. For some reason I am sure it isn’t because it is past midnight and I can’t think straight I can’t figure out how to link it up.

It’s not delivery …

It’s Digiorno!

I am a Game Day Believer!

Somehow I got hooked up with HouseParty.com and applied to host a DiGiorno Pizza party.

In my party package I got ….

How awesome is that?!?!

I am super excited to host my party.

Has anyone else ever heard of houseparty.com?

Sometimes it is necessary to repeat the past

I have been praying to find a part time job that gives me the ability to still go to school and be home at night to help Jacob with his homework.

I thought about being a server again … but I would be away nights.

I applied to a few places  … but I never got any call backs. (My availability is very limited)

On Friday, my old regional manager called me and asked me what hours I would be willing/available to work.

I gave him my hours and he told me I would hear back from him.

So … today he called me and I can start on Wednesday.

And … I will be at the same pay rate I left at.

Isn’t that just the best news ever?!

I am so happy. This is just what I wanted.

It’s a decision

The definition of forgive is to 1)give up resentment of or claim requital for 2)to grant relief from 3)to cease to feel resentment against.

Forgiveness is a decision.

No one is perfect. I know that I am far from perfect. I fall short in every aspect of my life. I make mistakes every day.

Forgiveness is a decision.

I have written in the past that I have not been a good friend to the one’s I care about. I have hurt them and upset them. I have allowed my every day struggle’s to over come me. I have failed to meet my friend’s needs.

Forgiveness is a decision.

I have made mistakes and if I could go back and correct my behavior I would. I regret the fact that I haven’t picked up the phone to call my friends. I regret the fact that during a difficult time in my friend’s life I wasn’t there to comfort her. I regret the fact that I didn’t make myself available to them.

Forgiveness is a decision.

I was so caught up in my own sadness, my own life trials, and my life’s changes that my friends were not a priority. I allowed school work, house work, my boyfriend, and my son to take every inch of my thoughts.

Forgiveness is a decision.

I am hoping that my friends will forgive me. I am hoping that they will choose to forgive me. It has come to my attention that they may never forgive me. It has come to my attention saying sorry isn’t enough right now. Emails and text messages are going unanswered. I tried making a phone call today and that too went unanswered.

Forgiveness is a decision and I hope they choose to forgive.

 

Guess What?!?!

The video game tickets are working!! Mrs. C, Jacob’s Reading Recovery teacher, wrote me a note saying Jacob had a great day yesterday.

So far, he has earned 30 minutes of video games. The best part is that he is saving them and hasn’t played video games in two days! (Can I get an Amen for that?)

Also, my old job called me and asked me if I wanted to work part time. I gave them the hours I would be available and they are going to call me back.

I have been praying for a part time job that wouldn’t include serving people food. I am hopeful that this pans out and they allow me to work part time.

Lastly, Jacob is now required to read 30 minutes every night for school. It was 10 minutes but now that half the school year has passed it has now been bumped up to 30.

I was thinking about getting a chapter book to read every night. We read Charlotte’s Web together and he really liked it. If anyone has any ideas for a new chapter book I would greatly appreciate the advice.

That’s it for now. Tons to do this Saturday. I have laundry and a little painting. Dan is going to help me stop the leaky faucet in the bathtub.

Lots of fun.

New Reward System for Jacob

I received a phone call from Jacob’s Reading Recovery teacher, Mrs. C, yesterday. Mrs. C informed me that Jacob’s behavior has been less than stellar the past few days.

I was informed that he …

*Refuses to read books he has already read.

*Refuses to read enthusiastically according to the symbols (i.e. – ! or ?)

*Is unwilling to cooperate with Mrs. C

*Is slow to coming to her classroom

After speaking with Mrs. C, we both think that putting a reward system in place for positive behavior in the home would be beneficial to Jacob.

So, I created these …

They say … 5 minutes of video games!

Jacob loves video games and always asks to play them. The main form of discipline in our household is to take away video games if Jacob disobeys.

Now video games can be a reward for his good behavior. If he gets a good behavior report from both his Reading Recovery teacher and his main teacher I will give him his reward coupon.

He will also get reward coupons when he does good things around the house like clean his room, make his bed, not arguing with me at homework time, and by any other behavior I deem qualified for a reward coupon.

I feel that this will help both of us …

1)Jacob will have good behavior in order to accrue coupons.

2)I will be able to better monitor his video game time.

Hopefully this works. I will definitely keep you informed about how this goes.

What types of reward systems do you have in place in your house?

Rise and Shine!

As you can tell … it is snowing here! For what the weather stations are saying we should expect 1 inch every hour from Noon to 6 this evening. (I am kind of hoping for a snow day tomorrow with school being cancelled … don’t tell anyone!)

 

Anyway … on the the reason I need your help. My morning routine needs some help. Truth be told … I am not a morning person. Neither is Jacob.

Most mornings we are rushing around trying to get out the door.

Most mornings there is more yelling than anything else.

For instance, this morning we were rushing more than usual because of the snow, and Jacob was yelling and then I started yelling.

Our conversation (I use that word lightly) went like this …

Me: Good morning Jacob! It’s time to get in the shower. Just quickly wash your hair and body then get out. I am going to start the car and throw your clothes in the dryer to warm them up.

Jacob: I’m not getting in the shower. I took one yesterday.

Me: Get in the shower now. We don’t have time for this. You are showering.

Jacob: I’m not showering and you can’t make me.

Me: (While I am turning the shower on) GET IN NOW!

Jacob: I don’t want to get in the shower. (Now he is starting to cry)

Me: Well I don’t want you to have a TV in your room anymore so you can’t have it. Wouldn’t it be easier to just get in the shower?

After that Jacob stomped to the shower and got in. I then shoveled the sidewalk and a little bit of the driveway, threw his clothes in the dryer to warm them up, started the car, and made his lunch.

I do not like having morning like this.  Needless to say, he doesn’t eat breakfast and chugs a juice box in the car on the way to school.

I feel like I should be sending him to in a good mood and with God in his heart. I feel like I am failing him.

I would love if you would share with me how your mornings go. Do you get up super early? Pack lunches the night before? Take showers the night before? (If you do that … how do you handle bed head?) Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

One Word

Today has been an extremely lazy day for me. Jacob was at his dad’s house for the weekend and the only thing I did was go to the grocery store. Since I had the opportunity to just sit around I caught up on my blog reading. The one thing I have noticed is that many people are posting their New Year’s Resolutions. I enjoyed looking through everyone’s list and decided to make my own list.

To be honest, I have never really been a fan of New Year’s Resolutions because I can never follow through with them for more than a day. But this year my life is different. I do not have as many obligations as I normally do so that makes this the year of change.

On a few blogs I read about the Word of The Year 2010.

You can read about the Word of the Year 2010 on these blogs.

Ali Edwards (on this blog you can download the Word of the Year guide – this really really helps)

Of Love and a Baby

Brown Eyed Fox

I love this idea and I wanted to come up with my word of the year too.

Being the perfectionist that I am I wanted to come up with the PERFECT word.

So first I made a list of words …

Breathe

Change

Fearless

Simplify

I love each and everyone of these words and couldn’t decide. So I decided to use the dictionary and look up each word.

And then I found it…

REFINE

1: to free from impurities or unwanted material

2: to free from moral imperfection

3. to reduce in vigor or intensity

4: to free from what is coarse, vulgar, or uncouth

5: to become pure or perfected

6: to make improvement by introducing subtleties or distinctions

To me this word means to …

refine – my schedule

refine – my walk with Christ

refine – my life

refine – my constant yelling tones

refine – my mornings

refine – my relationships with my family and friends

I love my Word of the Year.

What about you? Have you thought about what your word could be? I would love to pray for each of you and your words.

 

I am not a juggler … Are you?

In the last six months my life has changed dramatically. I quit my job and went back to school full time. Jacob started first grade and subsequently he has quite a bit of homework each night.

Even though my day is no longer filled with a full time job it has been filled with reading, papers, homework, and attending classes. The five classes that I was taking were very difficult for me (um … I am taking about Greek Philosophy) and each class had a ton of work to complete each evening.

Jacob is in a special reading program at school to help him catch up and every night he has to read 10 minutes, read the assigned book, and do the cut up sentence he created. Then most nights he has a worksheet of some sort to complete. Then he has his word wall flashcards and his math facts flashcards to complete as well.

Sometime in there I have dinner to make, laundry to do, and a house to clean.

My day really is busy.

The problem is … MY FRIENDS ARE MAD AT ME!

I am not juggling my new life very well. School and Jacob is the only things I am juggling well. My friends informed me that I never call them and that I need to juggle everything better.

One of my friends “D” said that she juggled a newborn, a full time job, and grad school. And she also said that I let her down.

My friend “J” said that I make her feel like she is an unimportant friend.

I feel awful! My friends are super important to me. They are like the sisters I never had and they are my family.

I have tried texting them and calling them but I obviously made them really upset and they are not calling me back.

I want to make it right but I just don’t know what to do.

Does anyone else struggle with juggling everything in their lives? Do you give more time to one thing than another? Do your friends get mad at you like mine have?

What do you think I should do? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.